I'm sick. Head cold, chest congestion, chills, general feeling of disgustingness. I think my body is physically trying to make me procrastinate studying for my H2P exam. Which is tomorrow.... oh god.
At least my italian test is over. It was hard, but I probably got a B. I've skipped EnviSci for two days. I've had good reason, but I really need to get out of the habit.
Make me blue forever, like an island sky.
I've been really down lately. I always get depressed at the beginning of the school year. I went to the counseling center on campus, finally. That was an ordeal in itself, but my actual consultation went well. I still haven't heard from anyone about it, though. Which makes me think they don't have any openings.
I genuinely wanted to drop out of school on Saturday. I just... I hate it here sometimes. I was so excited at the beginning and I've been so disappointed. There's nothing here. I've met a couple of really awesome people, but that's it. I don't know. I always feel isolated. I've never really gotten over that. I think it's worse when I'm surrounded by people all the time.
There are just too many sad things right now.
I hope I still get to go to the Rally to restore sanity. I hope I'm well enough to even go.
bleghalkdx.
K. Time to actually study.
Baby! I hope you get to go, too. I really do. And don't be down. I know it's hard - it's hard for me to have friends when I have so much work to do right now, but keep in good spirits because there is music to be made and to be danced to and beautiful, autumn air to bask in.
ReplyDeleteOnce you feel like you've found your niche there and really hit your stride, things will get significantly better. That's what I've found out so far about college. Took me a while, but at least you've got Fayetteville as your city of residence. Conway is a little hard to find a niche in when you're from Fayetteville. I promise you'll find your place that will renew your passion and your love of life. Just keep swimming. You are beautiful, talented, and intelligent to boot, so keep your chin up.
ReplyDeleteLove you.